Today, instead of being stuck in the house all day with Jason, we decided to go to the park.
I picked up a spider and dangled it above Shanti's head. "Shanti-it's a friend!" I did my evil laugh and dropped the daddy long leg into her hair.
Shanti started screaming. "Ewww! Get it off! Jason-where is it?"
I watched in utter disgust as Jason fished around in Shanti's hair for the offending bug. "Here it is." he said, holding it up.
Shanti brushed through her hair and itched her arms a couple times before she turned on me. "What is your deal? Why are you being so obnoxious?"
My parents came over from the bench they had been sitting on. Dad stood between Shanti and I, the way he used to right before we were about to get into dirty fight. "What's the problem?"
I was about to make a quick excuse before Shanti could tell on me when Jason cut in. "It was just a joke. jordan put a spider in Shanti's hair. But it's out now."
Shanti and my parents were all looking at me the way they always did when I did something I shouldn't do in front of Jason. But I was sure nobody could have been more embarrassed than me at that point; I hadn't done things like putting bugs on, around, or even in (long story) since Shanti could scream and I could be devious.
My dad knew that I was really embarassed so he just nodded at Jason. "You have my permission to tackle Jordan." He smiled and went back to the bench.
I looked at my shoes. All of a sudden I was on the ground. Jason was laughing on top of me. I pushed him off me, gasping for breath. "It was a joke!" I paused to force more air into my lungs. "You-you weren't really supposed to tackle me!" I stormed off in the direction of the house with Shanti's shouts ringing in my ears; "Come on, Jordan! Can't you take a joke?"
Normally I could. I knew I was being stupid about this whole thing. But as I stomped up the stairs to my room, something in the back of my head said; can I ever show my face to them again?
Did you like it? Keep your eyes out for the next few sections!
Friday, December 18, 2009
Today, instead of being stuck in the house all day with Jason, we decided to go to the park.
Posted by Jocelberry at 1:19 PM
Friday, December 11, 2009
I waited in the bushes. There was the car. It pulled into the driveway. Sure, make yourself at home, Jason. I thought.
The car door opened, and Jason stepped out. He looked nervously at the house and started up the walk. My grip tightened on the trigger. Jason came within aim. BOOM!
"Ouch!" Jason stumbled back, gripping his arm. I snickered. Oh, look, Jason's got an owwy.
Jason looked at the paint stain on his shirt. I used the chance to escape back into the house.
"Oh, that." Jason glanced at his gray t-shirt to the splattering of black paint on the shoulder.
"It's kind of weird."
I looked up from my mashed potatoes. "Yeah it's weird. Why did you even buy it? And Shanti's always saying that fashion's everything-you two obviously aren't cut out for each other."
Shanti glared at me, mouthing the words "shut up". That was another thing that had changed between us; she was so mean to me now.
Jason laughed nervously. "No, I mean how I got the stain. I was walking up the driveway, and...what I think was a paintball hit me."
"Oh, the neighborhood kids can bee so bratty sometimes." Mom's mouth twitched. She was obviously thinking the same thing Shanti was.
Shanti pinpointed me with her "this better not be true" glare. "Jordan, where did that paintball gun I got you for Christmas go?"
I knew my face was probably going white. "I dunno."
Shanti cocked her eyebrow at me. "Uh-hu."
"You fail to mention that you bought me that thing when I was twelve. I haven't seen it in forever. I haven't used it in forever too. It's probably at the bottom of my closet right now-or maybe it isn't! I don't even know! I-" It sounded fake even to me.
But Shanti held up her hand. "I'm sorry, 'k?
"You better be."
Jason laughed even more nervously. "Brake it up, you two. Brake it up."
I glared at Jason. "You don't have to repeat yourself, what do you think we are-deaf?"
Did you like it?
Keep checking up for the rest of the updates on the story!
Posted by Jocelberry at 12:18 PM
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
I know you were all expecting an amazing continuation of my amazing story I wrote a while back.
But I found out that microsoftword and blogger don't work well together...So I'm taking a little time off from that (I'll go into that later). And besides, I have something much better to show you today!
It's one of those amazing "International...so and so, such and such..." days.
So, from now on, I want you all to celebrate the "International Kylie is Awesome Day!" So as soon as you read this post, (Since you're already on blogger and your computer) write a post talking about how awesome Kylie is...even if you don't know her! Take my word for it...SHE'S AWESOME!
So get to work! I want to see posts every year declaring how awesome Kylie is!!!!!!!
Posted by Jocelberry at 2:28 PM
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Hey, everyone! I wrote this a while back and thought you might enjoy it!
When my sister was fifteen years old, she fell in love with this other gawky fifteen year old. Although I was only twelve, and didn't know about the existence of crushes, I was still glad to see the Williamsons move away for a little three years on a military tour. Then everything went back to normal...until last year.
The family came back. The gawky teenager had turned into an attractive eighteen year old and seemed to have every intention that he could just barge back into our family. And my sister let him. I didn't have to be told anymore. I was fourteen and could tell when things were beginning to get serious.
While my parents and sister were seemingly falling all over this guy, I grew to despise his every move. I hated that while I gave Shanti a wal mart gift certificate, Jason got her chocolate, among, like, six other things.
Shanti started treating me differently when she was around her beloved Jason. She didn't tease me anymore. When I tried to talk to her about it, she got grumpy with me. I didn't like the way Shanti glared at me the rest of the day so I decided to take it up with Prince Charming.But I lost my nerve every time I approached him.
So I settled for dropping hints.
I suggested that I had known Shanti since I was born. That I had come to love her first and knew all her deepest darkest secrets that she wouldn't dare tell Jason. And it should be that way. After all, I did live with her.
Jason took the hints. He started coming to my house every day, as if to say; "who says I don't live here?"
He found out my interests by way of bribing my parents. He tried to get to know me by saying things. like; "So I hear you like to play basketball, want to play a coupe of rounds?" To which I would bluntly refuse.
But all my hard work failed me. One night, a year later, Jason came over to help on a project he and my dad had been working on in the backyard. When they came in, my dad's eyes were shining. the next morning my sister danced around the house. I put two and two together and asked my mom if the question had been asked. She giggled and told me yes.
Shanti and Jason would enter into courtship.
I made up my mind then and there that I would kill Jason.
Did you like it? I'll be posting the rest of the story in the next couple of weeks!
Posted by Jocelberry at 7:40 AM
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
As the title indicates, the culprit is my brother, Sam. Here are some pictures of him to give you an idea of what he's like.
Ok. If the idea you got was that he was an angel, and liked wearing hats. You were right in one area. He loves hats and is a ham for pictures. In the last picture of him, he was an angel. But he was asleep. Alright. I admit that Sam is really great most of the time...but when he isn't...well, that's when I push him into toilets.
So today is mostly stay at home day. The boys are in a slightly bad mood as they usually are when my Dad's gone for a little while. And then I hear it.
My sister and I are eating our lunch. Catey looks at me and says: "it's your turn to check on Sam next."
Reminders like this are pretty easily satisfied. You just yell out, asking if the boys are staying out of trouble and they usually yell back something to the effect of: "We're not making a mess!"
And Since Catey just said next and not now, I kept on finishing my lunch. That's when I heard it. The sound isn't something you can put into words. I don't mean it's indescribable. I mean that it's not really any real words. just a string of gibberish from a two-and-a-half-year-old. But when you hear that sound-you know what it means. That wordless call can be roughly translated to: "I NEED A WIPING!"
So I get up like any dutiful sister who wants the screaming to stop, and walk toward the bathroom.
The screaming stops when I walk through the door. Sam is sitting on the toilet, waving a wad of toilet paper at me. I take it, starting the usual polite bathroom conversation. "You didn't try to wipe yourself, did you?"
Sam says no, so I believe him and wipe him. Then, (terrifying 'bad news' music) I flush the toilet.
Sam yells at me. "I want to flush it!!!!!!!!"
It's too late. That's what I told him. But it was really too late to stop the terrible doom.
Sam (Who doesn't like listening to anything once it involves him not getting his way) gives me his evil eye, reaches behind him, and flushes the toilet again-before it's done flushing from the first time...and he's holding the handle down.
Before I tell you what I did next, let me just explain something to you. My dad is the main fix-it person in our house. But he teaches all of us a lot of stuff. But somehow, I'm the only person who actually remembers any of it. So I really don't like it when Sam is messing up the toilet...especially when Dad isn't back till tomorrow.
I was washing my hands at the moment I saw Sam do it. Angry, pulling my hands out of the water, I yell at Sam to stop it.
He doesn't, of course. He just gives me a look very similar to the look he's giving the camera in the first picture.
Not thinking about the fact that my hands are still wet and that Sam's backside isn't really as large as it should be for the toilet, I shove his hand off the flusher handle thingy.
Sam lost his balance, like majorly. He slipped so that the only thing keeping him from falling into the toilet water below, was his arms and legs, both looped around the seat.
I pulled him up instantly, feeling kind of bad. but I'm not going to let him off so easily. Shoving him into the toilet wasn't enough punishment. So I talk to him. "Do you know why I..." oh boy. "why I pushed you into the toilet?"
Sam's reply clearly indicated his shock. "You pushed me into the toilet. That hurt."
"Yes, but do you know why?"
"You pushed me into the toilet."
I asked the question about ten million times more, telling Sam the answer each time. the response was always the same.
"You pushed me into the toilet. That hurt."
Finally I got the point across to Sam that he shouldn't hold the handle down because it could break the toilet.
I don't know if he really gets it. He's done so many thing to that toilet. Once he put about half a roll of toilet paper in the bowl while Mom and Dad were gone.
But that's another story.
Posted by Jocelberry at 12:40 PM
Sunday, November 1, 2009
me not writing a post.
That's right. I don't have time to update on anything except to say that I am not updating.
Hopefully I'll have time to post something that's actually a real post soon.
Have a happy day!
Posted by Jocelberry at 10:10 AM
Monday, October 12, 2009
I promoted her to the position.
Posted by Jocelberry at 6:49 PM
Monday, September 28, 2009
Bethany was laying down in the tub. She watched as she raised her foot (which was starting to turn into a giant raisin) out of the water and plopped it back in, making the bubbles in her water make little popping noises. Then came the bad news, the doorknob clicked as it opened. And in it came. It was furry, it was huge, it was pink with Hawaiian flowers! Bethany closed her eyes tightly. The thing spoke.
"Bethany, it's time to get out of the tub."
Bethany stood up, reaching for the towel. "Ok, Mom. You can unplug the bathtub, and I'll get dried off."
Mom snatched the towel away, cruelly. "Bethany, be a big girl and unplug it yourself. I've done it for five years, it's your turn now."
"I think I want to stay in the tub a little longer."
Mom gave Bethany the evil 'someday-when-you-have-kids-and-they-give-you-a -had-time-I-will-laugh-in-your-face' look. She stuck a finger in the tub. "Bethany, you've been in here for almost an hour. The water's freezing. Come on, get out."
"No!" Bethany was ready to cry. She was too scared to unplug the tub. When you unplug the tub, you go down, down, down the drain with the rest of the water. Bethany had never witnessed this happen before, but she'd heard about it from her older brother.
Mom gave Bethany another look. But this time it was the deadly 'If-you-don't-start-cooperating-right now...' look. Mom never finished that phrase. She didn't have to, Bethany knew what she meant.
Mom started tapping her foot.
Bethany squeezed her eyes shut. A few tears slid down her cheek as she slipped her hand into the water. She yanked it back out. "I can' do it!"
Mom wasn't being merciful today. Her foot continued to tap, and the deadly look was still on her face.
Bethany started screaming and crying. Mom didn't even move-except for her eyebrow. She was doing the eyebrow-cock.
Finally, Bethany reached her hand down to the plug and was promptly sucked sown the drain without another trace.
"Bethany, stop crying. Just do it." Mom reached over and grabbed Bethany's hand, guiding it toward the drain.
Without any other choice, Bethany unplugged the drain all by herself and was promptly not sucked down the drain!
From then on, Bethany was never afraid of unplugging anything. She always remembered how brave she had been that day and it helped her never to be scared!
Until the day she had to take her first shower...but that's another story.
There is an analogy in that story so whoever can guess the correct one gets a post written for them. My next post will explain the analogy if no one can get it.
Posted by Jocelberry at 2:37 PM
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Posted by Jocelberry at 10:07 AM
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
My grandma has been visiting with us for the past eight days, and today we dropped her off at the airport. On the way back home, my mom took my siblings and I back on something called "the scenic route". As long as they don't take to long to go through, I find the scenic route pleasant. But today as we were driving, I was repeatedly annoyed by my sunglasses. They were tinted and made everything that was green look brown.
"Mom, I wish I didn't have to wear sunglasses,"
"My sunglasses are making those fields look brown."
"Joss, those fields are brown."
"No they aren't."
[Mom takes off sunglasses]. "You're right. They are green."
But I looked on the bright side of things, my old sunglasses were tinted brown and made the sky, the land, and the air look like the earth was severely polluted.
At least these pink sunglasses were more pleasant.
Posted by Jocelberry at 3:57 PM
Monday, June 22, 2009
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Hey everyone who reads my blog, I just wanted to show you a random poem that I wrote for a writing class this past school year.
The world is full of emptiness
Empty hearts full of hate
Empty minds plotting deceit
Any help that has come has come too late.
Then the rain comes
After endless toil
It washes limb and life
Destroying everything with the soil.
Finally after forty days and nights
We emerge from our home of wood
And in this new and empty world
There is hope of good.
The people’s faith in me was empty
They seemed so confident
But now in danger they panic
Am I really the one you sent?
With a mass behind and a mass in front
I don’t know what to do!
I can’t do this on my own
But that’s why my faith is in You.
With a simple lift of a staff
The waters make a path!
The ocean is emptied; its floor is clearly shown
While Egyptians see God’s wrath
The world is now empty
The savior has left
He was killed by his own people
Forgiving us with His last breath
In sadness, we make our way to the grave
But what can we do when we get there?
We crest the hill and gasp
The stone is rolled away and we can do nothing but stare
Inside are guards dressed in white
What do they mean ‘he isn’t here’?
The tomb is empty
And there is nothing to fear.
Is this easy to tell who I'm talking about?
That's all for now, Jocelyn :)
Posted by Jocelberry at 1:27 PM
Monday, June 8, 2009
As I said in my last post, I have a cold. One of the worst I have had in a while. SO bad, that I am actually doing something I never thought I'd do-I am losing my voice.
Although I m getting a little better now, it is still really bad. On Sunday I would start to try to talk in a slightly more normal tone (normal meaning I didn't sound like a caveman) and my voice disappeared. I would try to talk 'high' and my voice just wasn't there.
This leads into my thinking point-Phones.
Phones are really cool and everything but they OBVIOUSLY have some sound problems. A couple of days ago, when I was still talking like cave-Joss (my voice about ten octaves lower than usual-to give you a glimpse of how that sounds, my voice is lower than most thirteen year old guys I know) the phone rings.
I answer the phone.
"Hi, is this Catey?"
Ok. My older sister Catey, has the highest voice in the world, almost an octave higher than mine. She is a social butter fly and could be labeled as a 'Miss Susy Sunshine'. And with the tone my voice was at that day, I'm surprised that lady didn't ask if it was my dad.
Just something new to think about, which brings me to my next point; which is better-phones, or e-mail?
I don't have time to get into long drawn-out arguments right now, but maybe next time.
I'll be back soon with some more stuff to think about.
I'm sorry if I've shocked you with writing this many posts in-was that only two days? If you end up going into shock and have to go to the hospital, I'm sorry. You can leave a complaint in the 'comment' section.
Posted by Jocelberry at 7:08 PM
Friday, June 5, 2009
Posted by Jocelberry at 7:13 PM
Monday, March 23, 2009
Sincerely (especially the part about hating braces),
My before and after pictures...I am not pleased.
Posted by Jocelberry at 6:27 PM
Monday, March 9, 2009
Today I went on a field trip with my homeschool group. We did some interesting things there, like looking at bugs (no, excuse me - insects), petting sea stars (and other things like tarantulas), and saying that the lady who organized our field trip ruled the world.
But by FAR the most exciting part for me was the butterflies. We went into a large greenhouse-like room where butterflies from the rainforest flew all OVER the place! I felt breathless almost as soon as I walked into the room (mostly because it was so humid). My favorite type was a blue butterfly that looked plain when it closed it's wings, but was a brilliant blue when it opened them. although this butterfly was pretty, it never held still and I couldn't get any pictures of it.
But I did get pictures of other butterflies, some of which I would like to show you!
Posted by Jocelberry at 7:36 PM